not merely a friend

This is the thing I REALLY HATE in friendship: Letting your friend to have an unhealthy relationship. A relationship which is not good for her growth of heart. It is hard to let your friend going through to her relationship with a ‘yeah-just-an-average-and-he-seems-fine-just-because-you-love-him’ man. Then here comes the thing that you have to do: Letting your girl going through a relationship which you already know that it would hurt her, and say: I’M HAPPY FOR YOU BOTH & HAVE A HAPPY JOURNEY!

You know that you just have to wait for the BANG!!! The hard crash that would earn two possibilities: your girl’s destruction or your girl’s change into an iron-er woman.

We all know that there would be no perfect man in this whole WILD world. There’s no way that there would ever be a prince charming. Never – ever! We all have to see (and let) our girls going through to their unperfect men, and letting them learn how to accept them back when they hurts. This SUCKS! Open your arm, make your time, put your ears, and provide a shoulder – when finally she comes back just for crying when she has no one around her, whereas the real thing you want to do is crash her head back on earth and talk loud to her just for making her see the truth. And just when – finally she comes through her sanity, she goes back to mud – swims deeply. Until she does sinking AGAIN – deeper than before, and asking you for a hand – AGAIN.

All of us, woman or man – have to learn accepting our unperfect partner. We all are made unperfect, just to be completing each other when we find our partner. We won’t find a perfect partner, but we WILL find the one who’s compatible with us in everything. ‘You will just know when he comes, because you never want to let him slip on by even just for a sec’ once I told myself. We just simply want a hapiness for our girls – after all we, girls, have been through. Because it is so true, one of the hardest things in this world is being a woman.

Well, there is no greater power than love. You’ve been known and always know, that: All you need is simply LOVE. All I need is simply love. All that a woman needs is simply love. That’s ALL. Real and pure love. I don’t know if that kind of love exists. Yes, we all don’t know. It’s decade of Apple, fruit of technology – not love anymore. Almost all things are virtual, so is love. Love is a virtual thing not a real thing, this is how I oftenly think. How come women now become so cynical about LOVE? That includes me! And maybe you. There’s this joke: there are only two kinds of men – gay and jerk. Now here comes the truth about women: there are only two kinds of women – naïve and cynical (about men, relationship, and most of all – love). The first ones are they who believe that real and pure love does exist, and the other ones are they who deny to believe if that kind of love really does exist!

Your friend is just like you. All she needs is love. Because you are women. Woman is human. Love is a basic need of human – to love and to be loved. But I really hate this thing. Knowing that your girl chooses to be in a real serious relationship with a real seriously ‘you-have-never-imagined’ man who adores and loves her, while she OBVIOUSLY POSSIBLY CAN get a better man who adores and loves her equally. There’s this guy my girl’s dating. The guy whom at first I thought as an outstanding personality person. I scored him as an over-rated, note: AT FIRST. Then he proved it. He proved that I was wrong. You never really mean to cause any judgement over your girl’s lover, so do I. We – women – acts as ourselves, friends, lovers. We, true girl friends, never really mean to judge our girls’ lovers. The men just show it. So what’s the harm of putting their scores down? We don’t judge, we see fairly.

You don’t intend preventing your girl friend from being hurt. You just want her to be on a REAL PROCESS, not the process caused of her choice. That’s her choice anyway, and if she hurts – it’s the process though it’s different. But you just want her to grow – in a better way, not the way she’s in. You know she might have been in the point ‘X’ going through to point ‘Z’ if she’s not in this relationship. And now, you have to watch her reaching her point ‘X’ with her carrier – the same point ‘X’ that she should’ve been there if she’s not with THIS man. That’s the way I am thinking. And watching.

Well, there’s no greater power than love. Love will make you grow REALLY FAST, and love will stop you growing (or make you grow less). We love our girls – we, girls, always love each other. Girl friend is a person who will always be there, when no one’s around. Girl friend is a person who won’t directly blame you for the problems you cause, she will just make you think. Because she knows: You got the brain, you got the heart, you got all those things a woman need.

So here I am, standing still as a friend. Facing one of the hardest part of being a girl friend. It IS hard being a girl friend. Harder than being merely friend.

All New

Well... what would I say 1st... Ajigileeee, ni blog tulisan semua udah gitu postingan terakhir taun lalu! And I think that I should start writing again. All the things that I have going through, all the changes that I made, and all the circumstances that I have faced - they are all just bring an ALL NEW things.



We change and we grow
We learn then we know
Now we have known and we have grown
How to face all the sorrow
And face a better tomorrow



T*eah... so wise banget sih gw

Kepada Seorang Teman Perempuan

To a friend… (yang uda gua sms untuk baca entry ini)

Everybody seems to notice you
‘Cause you’re not really trying to hide a thing
Sometimes you’re cool
Sometimes your mood swings
No baggy shirts to hide the change
No shame, nobody to lie to
To pry with what’s inside of you…

And he say, she say
She’s too grown
Poor thing, all on her own
But who cares what they say
’Cause no one can judge you at all
It’s not who’s right or who’s wrong
Girl, you’re not alone…


Babygirl, take it one day at a time
You can’t just grow up overnight
Babygirl, I know you’re feeling butterfly
But everything will be alright
Everything will be alright


(taken from “Babygirl” by Stacie Orrico)

Inget percakapan kita di SMS waktu hari Kamis, kan? Kalo Stacie Orrico dedicates this song to all single parents, then I dedicate this song to you (I once dedicated this song to myself, girl…). The way to get it all is just with loosing all the hurt feelings inside – just release ´em all. YOU HAVE TO (and don’t ever say again “gw ngga tau harus apa”). OK – lu boleh bilang kaya gitu lagi, tapi jangan karena masalah yang sama :) Karena waktu lu berhasil dalam segala pekerjaan but you suffer in your heart – it all means NOTHING. Over all, you are learning. You are growing up, girl.

Beberapa waktu yang lalu, gw ngomong sama diri gw sendiri: “I just realize that it’s OK if I am not tough enough – it doesn’t matter if I am not strong enough. Because I am nothing more than a child. I am not a rock, I am just a human – a daughter. A woman with many sensitive feelings. A twenty something woman with a little girl’s heart.” So are you. You are nothing more than a child. If you’re not strong enough – that is totally alright, you’re learning. I know you struggle, and you’re becoming strong. Lo ngga payah, tapi belum bisa. Hehe…

Just do it (pinjem tagline NIKE). Do right because you know the right reasons – because you want to, not you have to. Oke, jeng…? I told myself: “When I am in an unfair situation, I will change the situation. I will turn it into something better, and get the best part from the worst situation.” Believe me, it IS hard to change the unfair situation, yang terpenting lo MAU dan MOVE. As I said, you know your needs – you know yourself. You know your heart.

Keep fighting… (ngga cuma surviving)